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LAZY F WORKING GUEST
RANCH
Things you should consider before booking a stay at the Lazy F Working Guest Ranch |
 
Please use a Subject line like "Lazy F Guest Ranch Information Request" to defeat the SPAM FILTER |
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LAZY F WORKING GUEST
RANCH
Things you should consider before booking a stay at the Lazy F Working Guest Ranch |
Please use a Subject line like "Lazy F Guest Ranch Information Request" to defeat the SPAM FILTER |
READ
FIRST !!!
Each
of these links leads to information
to
help you decide if this ranch is the "right" ranch
for
you and your family - READ CAREFULLY.
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Each type of ranch is different. What are you looking for? What we are - and are NOT. |
What I will and will not allow you to do on the ranch. |
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What you can do when you drive out the ranch gate. Sightseeing and/or shopping in the local area. |
I pick you up at the airport or your hotel and take you back... San Antonio $300 / Austin $330 / Houston $680 If I have to leave my house before 8 AM (0800 hrs) or arrive back at the ranch after 5 PM (1700 hrs) or wait for a delayed flight.... THERE WILL BE AN EXTRA CHARGE |
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What if you don't have a vehicle? $1/mile Roundtrip + $15/hour driver wait time. |
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OF THE ENTIRE RANCH |
IS THE EXPERIENCE "REAL" OR IS IT FAKE? |
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This is NOT a "Dude Ranch". We do not have lots of cutsie, fake cowboy stuff to do. This explains what you should expect here. |
Unless I specifically state a guest program includes meals, IT DOESN'T (not breakfast, not lunch and not supper) HOWEVER...... |
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A working ranch primarily raises cattle, but guests have become a part of the operation. Guests can learn to cowboy, roundup cattle, manage a cattle drive, brand and rope, vaccinate, tag, castrate, dehorn, palpate, worm, sort and ship to market. Build fence, manage pastures, and take part in daily ranch operations, as a cowboy or cowgirl. What you get to do may depend on what's going on at the time; what crisis arises; etc. You're not required to work, but can if you wish and learn a lot in the process. This definition completely describes the Lazy F WORKING Guest Ranch. |
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A guest ranch is designed primarily to entertain and care for guests in a ranch environment. Horses are often the only livestock. Horseback riding is emphasized, but other Western activities are available on an informal basis. The guest ranch is a home, and is shared with guests, who relax together in a very warm and personal way that is rarely available to visitors on the usual hectic fly-drive itinerary. The part in green describes the Lazy F Working GUEST Ranch portion of our description. In addition, I use the word "guest" because that is how people search on Google. |
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At a dude ranch, riding is a small part of the entertainment. Dude ranches are geared to catering for a wide variety of interests and are ideal for those who want a "something-doing-all-the-time" vacation. A full weekly program of Western activities is usually included in your holiday price - such as Wild West Shows, rodeo visits, square dances, barbecues and a host of sports and outdoor activities. The Lazy F Working Guest Ranch is NOT a Dude Ranch. |
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A luxury resort ranch offers the Western experience but also emphasize other activities such as golf, tennis and ballooning. Accommodations tend to be more luxurious than other ranches, and are very individual. The Lazy F Working Guest Ranch is NOT a Luxury Resort Ranch. |
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What you can and cannot do on the ranch... |
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In any room, building or vehicle |
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Can only ride if I can place them in a separate group from non-family adult riders. This is a working cattle ranch, not a dude ranch or proper guest ranch. Children under 10 would probably prefer one of our GREAT Texas Dude Ranches. Google Search ... Bandera - Cowboy Capital of Texas for great dude ranches for kids!! |
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Not in our rooms, buildings or vehicles. They may stay outside. |
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The ground is uneven with holes and obstacles that will cause your horse to trip and fall. There are some places on the ranch you can canter or trot your horse. There are some places the Wrangler on the ride might allow a full gallop but this will not be the norm. |
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The Wrangler on the ride is your guide and there for insurance safety. Although we cannot allow you to take a horse out alone, we do not require you to ride with the Wrangler. We only require you to be in shouting distance in case you need help. You are welcome to explore off on your own as long as we can hear you. You will find, mostly, you stay next to your Wrangler so you can listen to stories and ask questions. Asking and listening are the two primary ways to "learn to cowboy." |
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We recommend all riders wear a cowboy hat, long sleeve shirt, jeans, boots and gloves. You might also want to bring sun block. If you go to www.weather.com and type in "Smiley, Texas" This will display today's weather for Smiley, Texas. On the right you will see "Today's Averages and Records" under that block is a small hyperlink labeled "Historical Data" for all the months of the years. Bring clothing appropriate to the norm for the time of year of your visit. |
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Your stay at the ranch and what you do depends on the ranch work that needs to be done every day. Your stay is mostly "self directed". I will tell you what needs to be done and if you would like to do something else, I will make every effort to accommodate you... HOWEVER, sometimes there is ranch or cattle work that takes precedence to your desires and wishes. TELL ME when you would like to (for instance) go horseback riding .. or shooting ... or practice roping ... or try some play day activities ... I will almost always be able to do what you want ... ALMOST ALWAYS. |
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PLEASE DO NOT HESITATE TO REQUEST AN ACTIVITY You cannot hurt my feelings!! I am a retired US Army Lieutenant Colonel. I am a former Police Officer. I am a former Elected Judge. I have been shot at; screamed at; yelled at; stabbed; had my bones broken again and again (by horses); and cussed by professional killers and criminals. My goal at the ranch is to do everything I can to see you have a great time. But do not be offended when I tell you the ranch and cattle operation come first. I get busy and distracted. Guests come second and sometimes I forget what you want to do. REMIND ME!! TELL ME!! I am here to please you. If something is not right; if your room needs cleaning; if you want a special meal; if you want me to SHUT UP and quit telling stories; if something upsets you; if you are not getting to do what you feel you came to the ranch to do; if you ask to do something and I forget; if someone upsets you (me, my employees, my family, my friends ...) PLEASE TELL ME IMMEDIATELY. My job as an Army Officer, Police Officer, Judge, Dad, and Host is to handle problems. Nothing upsets me and nothing surprises me. PLEASE do not wait to get home... I cannot fix it after you are gone. |
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The premier travel review web site is www.tripadvisor.com Search for "Lazy F Guest Ranch" You can see our ranch (or me, mostly) appears to engender a "love / hate" relationship. Trip Advisor Reviews of the Lazy F Guest Ranch have been the exception to my statement "I am never surprised by anything!!" One of these (I'll let you guess which one) totally caught me by surprise. On the other hand, there are some really really nice ones that were "good" surprises. I never comment on the bad reviews ... if you read them closely and more than once, you kind of get a feel for the author and what is relevant. I want EVERY GUEST to write a review. And remember, a review is sometimes proof of my statement ... "I can't fix it, if I don't know about it! And I sure can't fix it once you are home and I only read about it in a review two months later!!" Somewhat discouraging, but I can fix it for the next guest. |
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UNLESS A SPECIFIC
PROGRAM GIVES YOU TWO PRICES: 1) WITH MEALS AND 2) WITHOUT MEALS..
HOWEVER ... there are two exceptions my employees and I have agreed on... #1 - Kenneth Lauer,
who works for me, is a chef ... He has agree to take over food service
for the
#2 - When circumstances
permit, we can lease you the kitchen, for a fee. When we do, you may buy
and prepare your own food.
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Cutting Horses - Calf Roping - Barrel Racing - Ranch Rodeos - Youth Rodeos - and special Rodeo events .. Something every weekend - see the schedule 18 miles fm Lazy F (MapQuest Location) |
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You watch local and state champion cowboys ride bulls 53 miles fm Lazy F (MapQuest Location) |
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This is pure fun.... these are NOT canned rodeos ... these are local and state teams of cowboys and cowgirls running in timed events that will get them seriously hurt or killed. Or just hurt, if they are lucky. They are competing for the chance to ride in the Ranch Rodeo at the San Antonio and Houston Annual Rodeos and make thousands of dollars if they win or a free funeral if not. These events are chosen to mimic real life situations these cowboy encounter every day!! |
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| If you do all the "hands on"
work my cowboys and/or I do, then you ARE a cowboy. If you learn
to round up and pen cattle, brand, rope, vaccinate, castrate, tag, de-worm,
doctor, sort, and take to market the animals you rounded up, THEN YOU ARE
A COWBOY or COWGIRL. If you ride with me to check fence, pastures and cattle,
in a truck or on horseback, it is what a rancher does. If you help move
cattle from pasture to pasture; rescue cows from the highway; build, repair
or take down fence; feed cows by truck or tractor; mow fields; use the
dozer to clear trails; go to town on errands; or any of the myriad things
required on a cattle ranch, THEN YOU ARE A COWBOY OR COWGIRL. My
18 year old daughter, Sydney, and her friends, who ride and help on the
ranch, will be quick to point out .. they are COWGIRLS and have been since
they could sit a horse or drive a truck at 3 years of age. You are just
not an "experienced" cowboy. Like a person who learns to fly a plane, if
you can take off; fly to a destination; and land ... you are a PILOT, but
not an "experienced" pilot. Experience comes with LOTS of practice ...
so to be an "experienced" cowboy or cowgirls, you will have to come back
several times.
For fun, you can eat round a camp fire, camp in a tent, fish in the lakes, hunt hogs, learn to shoot, learn to rope, learn to repair fence, feed cattle from the back of a truck, haul hay, put out mineral and salt, etc. etc. Not all cowboy work is done on a horse ... oh heck no. Unless you come at "roundup time", you will be doing whatever needs to be done on the ranch. We may have to drive to town for feed or parts. We may be repairing fence or equipment. I will TRY and spend as much time on a horse as you wish, but if there are other things that are going on, this is what you get to do or you can find something on your own to "self entertain" or watch. Do not expect to be "entertained" 24 hours a day.. this is not that kind of ranch. Read the descriptions again. This is a working cattle ranch, first and foremost, ... guests come second. This is not a 200 acre Texas "dude ranch", with 3 cows staked in the yard. This ranch covers 2500 acres; 4 square miles; or 1000 hectares. It is over 5 miles (8 kilometers) long. We run up to 300 momma cows, depending on rainfall. We have a herd of 20 horses. I usually turn the care and feeding of the horses and upkeep of the barn and tack to the guests. If you want. |
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| If you DO NOT come during a roundup (one week - twice a year), what you get to do will depend on what's going on when you are here. Or what crisis arises that requires immediate action, such as cattle on the highway or in the neighbor's pastures or a fence down. You are not required to work, but can, if you wish, and learn a lot in the process. I will try and take you horseback riding as much as you want, but sometimes I will have other things to do and you will have to go along or be self entertaining. I am not going to be 24 hour entertainment. I might add, when there is no roundup at the ranch, a lot of what you learn will be by talking to me. You ask and I will explain. Or I will explain without being asked. You can shut off the stories just by asking me to "be quiet." The Lazy F Working Guest Ranch "Learn to Cowboy" Non-Roundup program is much more relaxed and geared to your speed. When you especially want to do something, like ride a horse, ASK ME ... I can usually change directions to accommodate you. |
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